Proof the World Is Coming to an End

I saw this today at the grocery store and thought: Really? Do people actually eat marshmallow "salad"? If they do it is proof Armageddon is on the horizon.

I Could Probably Handle It...

So there I was sitting at a table for 4. Alone with my great current book, "Animal, Vegetable, Miracle" by Kingsolver. Alone in fact, in the entire restaurant. Staring out across the ocean, watching the sun drop out of the sky.

I was enjoying some black bean soup and a coffee, mulling over the options for medical school this coming year. The thought of traveling across the world is, to say the least, daunting. Far away from family, friends, my favorite deli's, snow, and the mountains.

My two acceptances so far have been to Caribbean schools which, the ones I'm accepted to, have great reputations, encouraging match statistics for residencies, and really unique opportunities for 3rd and 4th year clerkships. But it is a fact that the island students have to prove themselves, which can be a good or a bad thing. I know I will be a strong student with my nursing background so that doesn't scare me off too much. But the distance and the IMG status does cause me to hesitate a wee bit.

But then I sat back and sipped on my coffee and thought...

Nah...I think I can handle the hurdles...

SUCCESS!

So if there is anybody out there--I'm pretty excited to announce that I have been accepted to 2 medical schools!

So...now I just have to wait to hear back from the other 12 that I applied to...sadly the interview offers for the rest don't come out until February or later...

If there are still some of you out there...I promise I have emerged from the cave that I crawled into after India and will get back to posting again more regularly.

In some ways this knowledge that I am now for sure going to medical school is...almost hard to wrap my head around. I have spent so much time and money and made so many sacrifices to get to this point I almost thought that there would be fireworks and cartwheels when I found out.

But it was just a large envelope and at the time no one to jump up and down with. It did seem a little empty. Of course my family was over the moon but everything almost seemed bittersweet.

Anyway now there appears to be someone who is going to come along for the ride so...fingers crossed...

She's Baaaaaackkkk....

Hello friends near and far.

Happy to be safe and sound (and enjoying hot showers and electricity again)!

I am hanging out with my family while I wait for my interview on Wednesday. Bought a snazzy suit to wear, hoping it sees more than one MD school interview!

After that, still not sure where I am heading as I am in the process of negotiating my next work contract...NWT? Nunavut? Yukon? BC? Remains to be seen. Maybe someone will hire me as their personal chef and I can take a break from nursing all together. Yeah. That might happen!

I've decided to post the trip chronicles on Asystole. I've also got my pics uploaded on flickr...if you want the link, drop me a line.

Looking forward to catching up with people near and far. Hopefully my Delhi Belly and lower respiratory bug will both take their leave of me sooner rather than later.

Canada, I love thee...let me count the ways...

Final Days

It's no secret that I love Revy. A couple of weeks ago I went home and spent a few days sadly packing up my things to put into storage. It's hard to pack up when you don't know when and where you'll be unpacking.

To procrastinate, I went for one last road ride.

Finally, everything was done. And we loaded up James' jeep, Peanut, and the Cosmic Valise. I moseyed over to the storage space and that was that. A month ago I had a nice little house in the mountains. Now I have a swank storage space. Amazing how things change. I suppose the house didn't really anchor me, but with that gone I do feel like I am floating up...up...and away. No idea where I'll land when I get back from India. So far I am leaving the work thing open as I am still hoping to go to Whitehorse this winter. Time will tell. Looking at everything in there certainly makes me wonder...what is really worth keeping? Some of those boxes haven't even been opened since they were in storage in Victoria. I feel a purge coming on with my next move.

Does anyone have a gasoline soaked rag and a match??

As a final insult to the melancholy feeling of leaving a rainbow appeared. Yes. Like I didn't already know that this town was where the friggin' rainbow ended.
Sheesh.

Thankfully, Luc and Anna hosted a wicked jam that night and I proceeded to sing my troubles away. I couldn't have asked for a better send of. There were many fabulous musicians there that evening and I was pleased to have the opportunity to chuck along with them.

And so begins the next chapter.

Life Actually

Two weekends ago James, Verena, Aaron, Simone, unborn child (currently residing in Simone) and I went on a weekend jaunt to the mountains near Nakusp. It was a great way to come down from the stress of the last month, er...months, er... year...

I am useless when it comes to knowing where I am, knowing what to pack, knowing what plants could kill me, knowing if I should drink the water or not...this is where James and Verena really came in handy.

They did the map reading.

Okay, we all make mistakes.

Still looking for the trail head...

Eventually we did find it. And we were off. There were many jokes made regarding my poor packing abilities, as demonstrated by the multitude of things hanging off of my pack. Really, it had nothing to do with trying to be cool looking (though I did wish I would have brought an ice screw to hang off the side of my pack, just in case...) No, it was more to do with the fact that once the snow pants, down jacket, rain gear, sleeping bag, spare runners, and food were in, there was little room left for the tent and extra food divvied up at the last minute...Laugh all you want, I DID get an "A" in PE James!!! :)

I think this was James pointing out my ability to build a spacious lean-to with only twigs and moss...

Observe, Newlyus weddus.
Rarely seen in captivity. Though do seem to thrive in National Parks.
Often try to blend with surroundings whilst eating their prey...

More pointing.

We did get some great views...

Okay...you get the drift.

Just one more...

Efficient wood collection.

Okay, I'll stop now for real.

Simone in her racy rain gear. Meeeaaoowww!

We didn't let the cold temperatures and rain keep us from rockin' out (or rather, folkin' out).

Ahhh..down jackets under rain jackets...are we in BC?

We sort of dropped the ball on the fact that it was the long weekend and the ferry would likely take forever...but...the long line didn't stop us from enjoying ourselves.

Another roadside attraction.
(And a chance to dry the orthotics.)

Verena's violin carried down to the water, serenading near and far.

Fin.

How it Was

Again, apologies for the double post. Ah, instead of double post, how about this...if you wish to read my sappy monologue regarding the MCAT check out asystole.

It's been a crazy couple of weeks...more couch surfing with my suitcase on wheels.

I realized that in the past 4 months I've stayed at 11 different places, and attended 2 universities in 2 different provinces. Lost my boyfriend, my house, and nearly my sanity. Not an ideal situation to prepare for the biggest exam of my life. Still smiling though.

Well, that chapter is done. There was some celebrating post MCAT...

(Really, I only had that one beer...I swear).

Next day me and Cosmic Valise (my car) hit the road.

Then hit the breaks for a couple of hours on a closed TransCanada while an overturned semi and all it's lumber was collected.

And back to the mountains I went.

'Twas the Night Before MCAT....

Dear Blog Readers (yes I believe that I can make 'reader' plural),

In case you haven't pieced the obvious together I am writing the MCAT tomorrow.

I am desperately trying to be zen about the whole thing, which is proving near futile.

I know that the score tomorrow isn't going to define the rest of my life, and that it will not dictate if I get into med school or where. It may throw a wrench into the "when" part of the equation if I bomb it as I will have to rewrite and reapply (oh JOY!) again next year.

Ahh, next year. I can't even think about that.

This will be the longest and most intense exam I have written to date. So if any of you out there have any vibrant words of encouragement, last minute strategies, personal anecdotes of how you were bombing practice exams and then shone like an Asian prodigy on test day, or tips for what/how much to eat/drink during the 3 alloted 10 minute breaks it would be much appreciated. You can email me at subtleanvil(at)gmail.com if you don't want the blogosphere to know that you soiled yourself on test day but still got into Stanford.

I will spend the rest of the day trying to fight the urge to curl into the fetal position and suck my thumb and/or watch reruns of 'The Office' on my laptop.

1200h MST tomorrow...please send God/Allah/Buddha/Confucius/Mother Earth/Pan/Universe--whatever you believe in--- a shout-out on on my behalf.

Studiously yours,

ABB

P.S Please forgive the double-posting. It's getting down to the wire so I can't justify the time to make two separate postings on MCAT-eve.

Heart Ache

I like to think of myself as a fairly politically minded person, though my personality is one of fence sitting---which I know drives very politically minded people insane.

So I generally keep my opinions to yelling at the radio and spouting undereducated opinions off over wine at small gatherings with my near and dear ones.

I don't want to make my personal blog space the forum for political debate so I mostly keep my politics out, but todays current events have made my heart heavy with sadness and I needed to make a post about our military's ongoing occupation of Afghanistan (I know that is not the word I am supposed to use but clearly that is how some Afghanis see it).

Today three more Canadian soldiers where killed in the Zhari district. The names have not been released, except for one, Sgt. Shawn Eades aged 33. Husband, son, father of two girls aged 7 and 4. These three deaths are on the heels of other Canadians recently killed; Master Cpl. Erin Doyle, Master Cpl. Josh Roberts, and volunteer aid workers Jacqueline Kirk of Montreal and Shirley Case of Williams Lake, B.C.

Sgt. Shawn Eades

Master Cpl. Erin Doyle

Master Cpl. Josh Roberts

Both of my brothers are soldiers. Shandy is a retired infantry L.Col. and Russ is a RSM combat engineer who is also known internationally for his expertise in post blast forensics. They both have done numerous overseas tours and have each spent time in Afghanistan. Both have seen things that have changed them, both have lost comrades. The three that died today were combat engineers from my brothers Battalion.

In the morning my alarm is set to CBC radio so I hear the news first thing. When my brothers are away my stomach leaps to my throat when those early morning broadcasts announce another Canadian death. As soon as I hear from one of my sister-in-laws or the names are released I breathe a sigh of relief. That only lasts a second before it is replaced with guilt, knowing my relief means that suffering has befallen another family, or families.

I support our troops. Think our military is something to be proud of and have not ruled out the possibly of joining myself. But that aside, every time we lose another soldier over there I have to ask the question, for what?

Supporting the troops and thinking they ought to come home are not mutually exclusive sentiments. I believe we ought to cheer when they come home, show them how proud we are of their efforts. But it doesn't change the questions in my mind: what are we dying over there for? Does being a presence there 'free' people who are oppressed by religion and culture that dates back thousands of years?

Or does it only create a stronger resistance? More terrorists? More bombs?

I don't have the answer, nor can I pretend to have enough knowledge on the matters at hand to take any stance other than--will someone please tell me why we are there when NATO's piddly effort shows that most of the world doesn't care. Is it our duty to pick up the slack?

And my other belief...our men and women are losing their lives in a war that isn't ours.

Bring them home. Alive. Not in body bags.

To the families and soldiers that have suffered losses; be it wounds to the spirit, mind, or body, my heart aches for you and my prayers go out to you.

A Cranky Couch Surfer

I am too tired, stressed, and sad to write anything interesting, funny, or engaging right now.

But here is a little post for me to look back on someday and say,

"yes, job well done...you really stuck it out when it seemed like the sky was falling".

Because that is how it feels right now. Falling. Crashing down all around.

It's been one of those weeks where more often than not I say to myself, "what the hell am I doing all of this for?"

Why can't I be settled and happy? Why do I feel like I am doomed to be "always roaming with a hungry heart..."?

What I wouldn't give for a good nights sleep right now. Well not right now. I am trying to memorize all the parts of the citric acid cycle right now.